Watching Richard Linklater’s ‘Before…’ trilogy recently has been stirring up my emotional residue into a thick porridge of ideas. It is wondrous in conceit and execution. By turns a naive, funny, frightening, but ultimately hopeful view of a relationship stretched across many years.
One conversation I’m snuggling up with particularly often in the days since watching occurs in the middle film, ‘Before Sunset’. Celine and Jesse are discussing whether your disposition can change.
Jesse says, ‘I read this study that followed people who had won the lottery, and people who had become paraplegics. The study shows as soon as people got used to their new situation they were more or less the same. If they were basically optimistic jovial person, they’re now an optimistic jovial person in a wheelchair. If they’re a petty miserable asshole, they’re now a petty miserable asshole with a new Cadillac, a house and a boat.’
There are two glorious lessons in this:
- Go after whatever you want, don’t let fear of failing stop you. You’ll recover.
- And ultimately, whatever you chase won’t make you happier, so pick something where the chase fills you with joy.
Happiness is in doing.